someone made me upset tonight!
it was really bad that i stormed out of the house, ignoring the wet weather and made my way to the tube station without turning back at all. trust me, i was so blardy pissed off!
i felt the bottled up anger within myself that my face started to feel warm and i broke down :(( in the crowded mcm sardine tube, surrounded by unfamiliar faces - i cried. the tears automatically came out and i was so damn embarrassed to even look up; just incase anyone noticed it.
it was rather a pretty ugly sight; watching a girl sobbing dengan hingus-hingus dekat hidung and struggling to hold on to the rail so that she won't stumble and langgar people around her.
aaahhhhhh, what the fish! i don't even know them, so why bother?
they might just think, "oh poor little girl. she just got dumped by her boyfriend on a saturday night." <--do i look like i care?
honestly, nothing big happened that would worth my tears.
i was just...upset with the situation! being accussed of some crime that i didn't commit. and silly me, i even tried to stop it when i saw it happening with my two eyes. damn. should have just contributed 101% of my ideas right? right.
i hate when people put all the blames on me when there were other suspects too. i hate that no matter how hard i've tried to deny it, nobody listens. i hate that the real criminal just kept in silent and left me playing the role of the scapegoat alone. i hate myself for keeping silent and sacrificed myself to absorbed all the blames. i hate myself for not being able to gain the trust from others when i've said no for thousand times. i hate having myself repeated. i hate myself for being me; for exposing myself as an easy target and the most likely candidate to missbehaved. i hate myself for being weak and not able to defend from all the attacks. i hate myself for taking the "tears" exit.
never did i realise that among us all, i will always be labeled as the "bad one".
thanks, for i have learned it today.
Al-Isra'a: 36
"Dan janganlah kamu mengikuti apa yang kamu tidak mempunyai pengetahuan tentangnya. Sesungguhnya pendengaran, penglihatan dan hati, semuanya itu akan diminta bertanggungjawab tentangnya."
it was really bad that i stormed out of the house, ignoring the wet weather and made my way to the tube station without turning back at all. trust me, i was so blardy pissed off!
i felt the bottled up anger within myself that my face started to feel warm and i broke down :(( in the crowded mcm sardine tube, surrounded by unfamiliar faces - i cried. the tears automatically came out and i was so damn embarrassed to even look up; just incase anyone noticed it.
it was rather a pretty ugly sight; watching a girl sobbing dengan hingus-hingus dekat hidung and struggling to hold on to the rail so that she won't stumble and langgar people around her.
aaahhhhhh, what the fish! i don't even know them, so why bother?
they might just think, "oh poor little girl. she just got dumped by her boyfriend on a saturday night." <--do i look like i care?
honestly, nothing big happened that would worth my tears.
i was just...upset with the situation! being accussed of some crime that i didn't commit. and silly me, i even tried to stop it when i saw it happening with my two eyes. damn. should have just contributed 101% of my ideas right? right.
i hate when people put all the blames on me when there were other suspects too. i hate that no matter how hard i've tried to deny it, nobody listens. i hate that the real criminal just kept in silent and left me playing the role of the scapegoat alone. i hate myself for keeping silent and sacrificed myself to absorbed all the blames. i hate myself for not being able to gain the trust from others when i've said no for thousand times. i hate having myself repeated. i hate myself for being me; for exposing myself as an easy target and the most likely candidate to missbehaved. i hate myself for being weak and not able to defend from all the attacks. i hate myself for taking the "tears" exit.
never did i realise that among us all, i will always be labeled as the "bad one".
thanks, for i have learned it today.
Al-Isra'a: 36
"Dan janganlah kamu mengikuti apa yang kamu tidak mempunyai pengetahuan tentangnya. Sesungguhnya pendengaran, penglihatan dan hati, semuanya itu akan diminta bertanggungjawab tentangnya."
4 comments:
waaaaa.... what happened to you???! :((
nono, i sedeyyy :((
someone whom i thought would use the brain before speaking nonsense and have some sense before tuduh melulu... was acting the opposite way. so unfortunate coz i tot that person would have some ilmu up there in the head and realised that memfitnah itu lebih besar bahayanya dari membunuh. terlajak perahu bole diundur, tapi terlajak kata-kata? silaplaaaa....
thanks for your concern babe **hugs**
hope u r alright.. u seemed perfectly fine masa dinner..
karma karma.. the truth will prevail, thats wad i learn.. be strong and ride it out meanwhile..
i hope now kesedihan tu dah di get rid kan. :D
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